New to Therapy? What to Expect in Your First Session
You’ve known for a while that you need some help; you’ve meticulously combed through therapists on Psychology Today; you’re ready to make a change in your life . . . But what the heck does a therapy session even look like?
The unknown can be paralyzing, and I’ve seen this uncertainty hold people back from taking that final step. For those who have never been to therapy, the idea of a session may be influenced by different movies and tv shows (no, your therapist is not going to choke you). Hollywood has a way of making therapy all about the drama. Really? The first session is mostly about getting to know each other.
Just like any relationship, at the beginning, you’re trying to see if you’ll be a good fit. Even in a therapeutic relationship, you will not be expected to pour your heart out and unload your darkest secrets from the get-go. Here are some more realistic expectations:
Your therapist will ask you questions. Like, a lot of questions. Again, it’s the getting-to-know-you phase. Our job is to understand where you feel stuck, how you’re hurting, and what you want from therapy.
You set the pace. You can share as little or as much as you want with your therapist, and if you’re not comfortable answering a question, you can tell them just that. Therapy is the ideal place to practice your boundaries.
Like the first day of class, there will be paperwork. Typically you will complete intake paperwork before your session, but your therapist will probably review some of it with you, especially the bit about confidentiality.
You may feel nervous before and during your session. It’s okay; most people do! Change feels scary, not to mention opening up about yourself to a stranger.
Your therapist has heard a lot of crazy sh*t. You likely cannot and will not shock them. A good therapist will greet what you share with compassion and non-judgment.
You may spend time becoming oriented to a specific type of therapy, especially if it is something more structured, such as Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) or Exposure and Response Prevention (EXRP). Certain therapies may demand more concrete homework outside of sessions, though you always benefit the most by applying what you discuss and learn in therapy outside the therapy room.
Go ahead and remind yourself that your therapist is human, too. They aren’t perfect, and they don’t expect you to be perfect either. Remember, we’re really into non-judgment.
Following the session, you may feel a little vulnerable. Again, this is normal. You’ve likely opened up in a way you aren’t necessarily used to and can feel more exposed as a consequence.
Have any other concerns or questions about what to expect? Ask! Many therapists are more than happy to do a consultation call before you meet and want you to feel as empowered and comfortable as possible entering into therapy.